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Thread: Terrible Wrestling Jokes Version 3

  1. #901
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mazer View Post
    Gregory Helms now provides personal security for a prominent Footballer.


    "Stand back! There's a Harry Kane coming through!"
    Did you hear about Liverpool’s newest signing Mo Sala Sikoa. Good with headers but frequently warned by refs not to Samoan spike the ball.

    I think there’s potential there.

  2. #902
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badger View Post
    Did you hear about Liverpool’s newest signing Mo Sala Sikoa. Good with headers but frequently warned by refs not to Samoan spike the ball.

    I think there’s potential there.
    Oh....we doing Liverpool?


    What do you get when you cross the Million Dollar Man's Bodyguard with The Chimneysweep from Mary Poppins?

    Virgil Van Dijk.

  3. #903
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    Given the whole Vince McMahon lawsuit, can we remove "Crappy" form the title of this thread?

    What do you call a sticky Scotsman? Glue McIntyre (or Badger)

  4. #904
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    Given the whole Vince McMahon lawsuit, can we remove "Crappy" form the title of this thread?

    What do you call a sticky Scotsman? Glue McIntyre (or Badger)
    What does Donald have in common with America Badass Undertaker?

    They both changed their old threads.

  5. #905
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    We also both like Kid Rock, well I used to. and Limp Bizkit.

  6. #906
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    What does Mick Jagger have in common with the American Badass?

    They keep rollin'

  7. #907
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    What does Badger have on common with Hulk Hogan?

    They both take their vitamins

  8. #908
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    What do Dreyski and Bob Backlund have in common?

    They both like chicken wings.

  9. #909
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    What do nash diesel and al snow have in common?

    They both had a dog named pepper

  10. #910
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    What do Lex Luger and Mazer having in common?

    They both had impressive physiques in the 90s.

  11. #911
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    What do Lex Luger and Mazer having in common?

    They both had impressive physiques in the 90s.
    And still had hair eh @Mazer?

  12. #912
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    I can mail Mazer some of mine. I haven't gotten a haircut since 2019.

  13. #913
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badger View Post
    And still had hair eh @Mazer?
    What a hippie I was back then.

  14. #914
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    What do Lex Luger and Mazer having in common?

    They both had impressive physiques in the 90s.
    Also, we both had Expresses.

  15. #915
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    What do Cody Rhodes and premature ejaculation not have in common?

    One can’t finish the story and the other finishes too early.

  16. #916
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    How does Boogeyman bring something up that was forgotten about a long time ago?

    He opens up a can of worms.

  17. #917
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    I heard Vince McMahon and Tony Khan tried to break up a fight between Dwayne Johnson, Jeff Hardy and Bobby Fish once.

    You could say they were stuck between a rock and a hard(y) pla(i)ce!

  18. #918
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    Doubtful, Vince would have shit on someone's head and Tony Khan would have run away fearing for his life.

  19. #919
    an affront to god mth's Avatar
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    I was shocked when The Bruiserweight changed his name to Butch. I said, "What has Pete done?!" Thankfully The Big Strong Boi lured him into a tag team using his Tyler bait.

    I was sketching some wrestlers the other day. First I drew McIntyre then I drew Gulak. Then I got frustrated when i was trying to sketch freakin' Rollins. Did I mention it was a competition? We tied. It was a draw.
    Last edited by mth; March 1st, 2024 at 7:47 PM.

  20. #920
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    How does the Bruiserweight like his steaks?
    Well Dunne.

  21. #921
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    The man that gravity forgot used to work with no contract. He was a Neville without a clause.

  22. #922
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    If Lance Timothy Evers had tainted Darren Kenneth Matthew’s favourite beverage instead of Christopher Irvine….would that be a Storm in a Teacup?

    *hides under the table from the incoming tomatoes*

  23. #923
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    AEW

  24. #924
    Main Eventer
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    Instead of the former Sasha Banks, Tony Kahn almost signed someone else to play the CEO in AEW. It would have been Mercedes Phoné

    While she was out with that horrible ankle injury, the former Sasha Banks lost a LOT of weight. They were calling her Mercedes Boné

  25. #925
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    When she's lost, Sasha Blanks.

  26. #926
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    When the lights are too bright, Sasha Blinks.

    When she has no proper bullets in her gun, Sasha Blanks.

    When she goes out with big strong guys, it’s HOSS time.

  27. #927
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    Before she goes to the dentist, it's Floss Time.
    When she hasn't showered in a week, it's Gross Time

  28. #928
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    If it’s HLA with Nikki it’s Cross time.

  29. #929
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    Could also be Toss time in that scenario

  30. #930
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    Could also be Toss time in that scenario

  31. #931
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    Why did Isaac Yankee want to look at Mark Henry’s teeth? Because he ate the World’s Strongest Ham!

  32. #932
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    What did Hacksaw @Hacksaw have for school dinners? Sloppy Jooooooooooooooooesss!!!

  33. #933
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    I wonder if his favorite wrestler of all time is hulk hooooooooooloooooooooooooooooooooooookoooooogan

  34. #934
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    Man I love hulk Hogan so much. Who was it here that hated hulk Hogan? Whoever you are I hate you

  35. #935
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    Man I love hulk Hogan so much. Who was it here that hated hulk Hogan? Whoever you are I hate you
    @3puppies

    Sleep with one eye open lol.

  36. #936
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    Don give him a chance to write a letter of apology to you.

  37. #937
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    @mth @Donald @Mazer…looking at the title of this thread and substituting a k for a n….I want to see a Terrible Wrestling Jones character now…

    Oh wait…we had Nathan. Terrible Wrestling Nathan Jokes if somebody’s feeling frisky/generous with retitling this thread.

  38. #938
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badger View Post

    Sleep with one eye open .
    Clutching your pillow tight.

  39. #939
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mazer View Post
    Clutching your pillow tight.
    Exit liiiighttt
    Eeeenter niiiighttt
    Taaaaake my haaaand
    We’re off to Badger Badger land!

  40. #940
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    Before going to bed, the Boogeyman checks his closet for Dana Brooke.

  41. #941
    The 'me' in 'team' Dreyski's Avatar
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    ukraine
    The Legion of Doom went birdwatching.
    Animal spotted an impressive Turdus philomelos.

    "Oh, what a Thrush!"

  42. #942
    The Fresh Maker Mazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dreyski View Post
    The Legion of Doom went birdwatching.
    Animal spotted an impressive Turdus philomelos.

    "Oh, what a Thrush!"
    What happed to LOD at the library?

    "Oh, what a shush!"

  43. #943
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mazer View Post
    What happed to LOD at the library?

    "Oh, what a shush!"
    I was gonna say.

    “Ooooooohaaaaargggghhhh what a huuuuushhhh!!!””” *choon* but yours is just as good.

  44. #944
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    @Mazer

    What do Legion of Doom and 3puppies have in common.

    Shoes…as in “ohhhh what a huuuush! @3puppies lol

  45. #945
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    Come on @Donald I lay down the gauntlet. You’ve been underperforming.

    I was expecting 10 LOD puns by now…clearly you are not in a rush.

  46. #946
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    If I was in a Rush, he might complain to Tony Khan about me.

  47. #947
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    Boogeyman decided to eat beans when a moderator invited him round for dinner….then farted like Natalya.

    The host was @mthed…at this development.
    Last edited by Badger; April 16th, 2024 at 11:14 PM.

  48. #948
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    When lod faces demolition, hawk said "oh what a crush!"

  49. #949
    an affront to god mth's Avatar
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    LOD took a big shit. Oh, what a flush.

  50. #950
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    Quote Originally Posted by mth View Post
    LOD took a big shit. Oh, what a flush.
    The Legion of Poo.

    The Commode Warriors.

    What did they use to clean up the toilet?

    “Ooooooh what a bruuushh!”

  51. #951
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    Hulk Hogan was at the toy shop, looking at 12" figurines of John Cleese and Eric Idle. He asked the toy shop owner, "Do you have any 24" Monty Pythons?"

    Then Billy Gunn came in and said "I'm Monty Sopp and I've got a 24" python." And then he and Hogan started making out while the toy shop owner watched.

  52. #952
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    I heard Jey Uso will be starring in the play Sweeney Todd. He will be playing the title role, of course, as the Demon Barber of YEET Street.

    I heard Big E enjoys Jey Uso's matches because it's big YEETy men slappin' YEET.

  53. #953
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    I was hacksawed off when my Facebook account was stolen…for five days!

    Hoooooooo!!!!!

  54. #954
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    Triple H asked Fred Durst who should be fired, Seth or Roman.

    Fred replied: Keep Rollins, Rollins, Rollins, Rollins (uh)
    Keep Rollins, Rollins, Rollins, Rollins (what?)
    Keep Rollins, Rollins, Rollins, Rollins (uh)
    Keep Rollins, Rollins, Rollins, Rollins

  55. #955
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    What did Adele say when she saw Seth in the far side of the pool?

    "Rollins in the deep!"

  56. #956
    an affront to god mth's Avatar
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    Seth asked Adele how to beat Roman in an inferno match. She told him, "set fire to the Reigns."

  57. #957
    dude it's iron man.. man
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    tony kahn fearing for his life

  58. #958
    The 'me' in 'team' Dreyski's Avatar
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    ukraine
    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    What did Adele say when she saw Seth in the far side of the pool?

    "Rollins in the deep!"

    Must spread rep etc etc

  59. #959
    The 'me' in 'team' Dreyski's Avatar
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    ukraine
    Quote Originally Posted by mth View Post
    I heard Jey Uso will be starring in the play Sweeney Todd. He will be playing the title role, of course, as the Demon Barber of YEET Street.

    I heard Big E enjoys Jey Uso's matches because it's big YEETy men slappin' YEET.
    If Jey Uso was in Mark Henry's place with Mae Young, would she have given birth to FEET?

  60. #960
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    ukraine
    Jey Uso has started using Gail Kim's TNA finisher:

    'Yeet Defeat' (or is it Eat the Yeet?)

  61. #961
    The 'me' in 'team' Dreyski's Avatar
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    ukraine
    Mark Henry has a room in his house which contains only a singular piece of a window.

    It's his Hall of Pane.

  62. #962
    Furry, Filthy and Fun Badger's Avatar
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    How bad was Nash’s quad injury?

    Tear-able!

    Sorry it’s been a while since I posted one of these!
    Last edited by Badger; May 6th, 2024 at 2:03 PM.

  63. #963
    an affront to god mth's Avatar
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    I heard Bo Dallas is coming back not as a Bray Wyatt inspired gimmick, but as a Roddy Piper inspired gimmick, "Uncle Rowdy".

    I think the WWE show on Twitter should have started with Bronson vs. Julius. You need to lead Speed with Creed vs. Reed.

  64. #964
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    When I was in school, whenever we had an exam, and the teacher began handing out the papers, Andrew Martin would enter the class room, big boot the teacher, and hand the papers out himself, saying "Test, test, this is a test."

  65. #965
    Furry, Filthy and Fun Badger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donald View Post
    When I was in school, whenever we had an exam, and the teacher began handing out the papers, Andrew Martin would enter the class room, big boot the teacher, and hand the papers out himself, saying "Test, test, this is a test."
    First year in English high school, our rather pompous teacher who loooved to go on about his acting experience/criticism of authors..once addressed the class:

    Teacher: “Ladies and Gentlemen boys and girls!”
    Me *hoping the class would get it*: “Aaand children of all aaages!”
    Classmate next to me: “Degeneration X…” to many slightly muffled giggles.

    Teacher was confused!! :rofl
    “What are you on about? Pay attention!!!”
    Us: “Sorry sir!”

    @Donald @mth @Mazer Real Badger storyyyy! Sorry maybe not qualifying as a “Terrible Wrestling Joke”!! Oops!

    Letting you know three first as our most prominent wrestling jokers.
    Last edited by Badger; May 24th, 2024 at 2:11 PM.

  66. #966
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    I remember being in a science class and the teacher was talking about gold dust and it was funny.

  67. #967
    Furry, Filthy and Fun Badger's Avatar
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    What’s the name of Roderick Toombs’s uncle?

    Howdy Roddy Piper!

    Wyatt I chose to bump the thread with this terrible joke I don’t know! Bray these jokes don’t get any worse!

  68. #968
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    Surely by now he's Gray Wyatt

  69. #969
    Give me the World Belt, dammit Zarius's Avatar
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    What will Rocky's retirement match be billed as, and why will Capcom sponsor it?

    Final Fight

  70. #970
    Furry, Filthy and Fun Badger's Avatar
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    Sasha Banks had food between her teeth and asked Michael Cole what she should do about it?

    Cole: “It’s FLOSS time!”

    Sasha Banks had a lot of quoits and asked Michael Cole what she should do with them?

    Cole: “It’s TOSS time!”

    Sasha Banks was at a stable and asked Michael Cole to ask what the animals were and check his watch:

    Cole: “It’s HOSS time!”

    Sasha Banks asked Michael Cole who the leader of the New Testament is:

    Cole: “It’s KROSS time!”

  71. #971
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    @Donald

    If Jake Hager was a Viking like Ivar and Erik, he’d be Hager the Horrible.

  72. #972
    World Champion Donald's Avatar
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    If they opened up a hair salon, they'd call it the Viking Braiders.

    It's time, it's time, it's Viking Vader time time time time

    If they were on SNL, they'd be the Viking Bill Haders

  73. #973
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    Michael Cole had some comforting words to Sasha/Mercedes after her release…

    “It’s LOSS time!”

  74. #974
    an affront to god mth's Avatar
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    R-Truth was paying his bill at a restaurant and noticed there was an unexpected charge for a bowl of bisque. He disputed ordering it but the waiter was unwavering in saying he had. The argument escalated and his shouts could be heard throughout the establishment: "WHAT SOUP?! WHAT SOUP?!" Everyone could hear him, people over here: "WHAT SOUP?!" People over there: "WHAT SOUP?!" He encourged those who may have witnessed the situation to rise in support, saying, "If you feel me, stand up and say, 'WHAT SOUP?!'"
    Last edited by mth; June 7th, 2024 at 6:37 PM.

  75. #975
    Furry, Filthy and Fun Badger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mth View Post
    R-Truth was paying his bill at a restaurant and noticed there was an unexpected charge for a bowl of bisque. He disputed ordering it but the waiter was unwavering in saying he had. The argument escalated and his shouts could be heard throughout the establishment: "WHAT SOUP?! WHAT SOUP?!" Everyone could hear him, people over here: "WHAT SOUP?!" People over there: "WHAT SOUP?!" He encourged those who may have witnessed the situation to rise in support, saying, "If you feel me, stand up and say, 'WHAT SOUP?!'"


    I read that in the Soup Nazi’s voice!

  76. #976
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    f Wendy were a Pokémon, she’d be Pikachooooo!!!

    If Nash were a Pokémon trainer, he’d be Ash.

    If Brock were a Pokémon trainer, he’d be…well Brock.

    If Jesse James, Owen Hart and the Kat were a team, they’d be Team Rocket! Surrender now or prepare to fight! Meooowth that’s right!

    And now for something completely different!

    What did Tazz say when he hired Brock Lesnsr to paint his fence?

    “Well….here comes the paaaaaainnnnnt!”

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