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Thread: th: caRd & promos

  1. #11
    2003 R-Fed Number 1
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Britneys back garden with binoculars
    Rep Power


    We open outside the Landmark Theatre in Chicago across the lake.

    Mr. Showtime: Welcome to another edition of the huRt!
    Katie Holmes: Is that the name of the federation or the show?
    Mr Showtime: I'm not sure, Kev's pm box was full when I tried to pm him this week
    Katie Holmes: Breaking the 4th wall already?
    Mr Showtime: Breaking it? I don't even have one. I live in the park here across from the theatre
    Katie Holmes: And why are we even shooting from here?

    We cut to inside the building. The fans go crazy at the return to r-fedding of 9 time Grammy award winner, 3 time Brit award winner, 4 time Emmy award winner, 7 time nominee for Times Most Influential Person award, URW Survivor winner, former XRF Hardcore Champion and 2003 R fed Number 1: Justin Timberlake. Although it has to be said that most of the crowd seem to be pre teen girls wearing JT t shirts although there are a few 40 somethings and Revol wearing N*Sync t shirts as well.

    Justin walks down the aisle wearing his rebellious leather jacket rebelliously and by his side, the ever present Jonathan "The Coach" Coachman.

    Mr. Showtime: Fun fact, The Coachs real name isn't actually Coachman, he changed it to that so it was more relevant to wrestling
    Katie Holmes: What was his name before?
    Showtime: Jonathan Fightmaster
    Katie: ....
    Showtime: We don't have a titantron or anything here but it looks like J.T. has brought his own.
    Katie: That doesn't seem very realistic for a small time wrestling organisation...
    Showtime: Well it's the budget version...

    Showtime is right as a big screen TV is wheeled out onto the stage and blazes into life as Justin points to it as the crowd roar in anticipation.

    The Coach looks around beaming at the crowd, the crowd looks back at him slightly confused and J.T. just stares. He starts arguing at Coach who tries to get him to re-create the pose but Justin is having none of it.

    Justin: God damnit Coach, that is not what I wanted for my triumphant return. You had one job! I should have left you begging for scraps outside the Amsterdam Arena where i found you.

    Coach looks sadly down at his feet.

    Showtime: Fun fact, The Coach's top begging strategy involves him dressing as a little old lady and chatting up naive college students
    Katie: Why do you even know that?
    Showtime: My strategies weren't working and I needed the money

    Justin: It's me, it's me, Justin T in the place to be...the only place left to be at the moment. The great R Feds of years past have fallen by the wayside. XRF, RWA, URW and RWF. Once titans of the industry and now, almost forgotten memories. Of course thats no surprise. Once I left URW it fell apart, once I left XRF it died. And RWF and RWA never even had my star power to get them through the dark times.

    Coach enthusiastically nods behind Justin T, until his glasses fall off his head. JT looks at him as he starts to remember why he fired him in the first place.

    JT: When I started here, everyone thought i was a joke. No one saw the danger in URW survivor until I stood triumphant at the end of it as the last man there.

    Coach: But didn't you win that just because you refused to leave the building unless Jarvis Jones declared you the winner.

    JT: A wins a win Coach, you'd know that if you'd ever won anything.

    Coach: But he didn't do it, he just went home and the cleaning staff just told you you'd won so they could close up for the night.

    JT: Yes and then I went on to be one of Time magazines 100 most influential people in the world 7 times in a row.

    Katie: Its a scary world when a washed up R Fedder can be that influential
    Showtime: I'm influential?
    Katie: Different washed up R-Fedder...

    JT: And just like in URW I'm here to take over the R-Fedding world and bring it back to the glory days.

    Coach suddenly looks up guiltily.

    JT: Glory days, Coach. Days.

    Showtime: You know-
    Katie: If you say you've got a fun fact one more time I'll stab you with my pen
    Showtime: ...
    Katie: ...
    Showtime: ...never mind...

    JT: I don't know who my first opponent is going to be, but I do know that I will prevail, I will make an example of them and I will be the first huRt champion.

    Justin drops the mic dramatically and starts to leave.

    Coach: Yeah! Thats exactly what he'll do!

    JT: Damnit ruined a perfectly good ending.

    Coach: Well I promised myself my days of giving happy endings were over when I came back here!

    JT: You disgust me Coach.

    Coach: I keep showering but I never feel clean.

    JT and Coach walk behind the curtain, still arguing.

    Xavier "Phoenix" Life walks out to the crowd but the entire pre-teen crowd is already finding their way out of the theatre now the man they came to see, Justin Timberlake, has finished up. The backstage staff are already removing the tv and are cleaning up after the huge firework display as Xavier walks to the ring sadly. The newcomer who many haven't heard about yet just can't compete with a world wide megastar like Justin Timberlake.

    Xavier: Damn you Justin Timberlake, and I didn't even give you permission to use me in this promo!

    Xaviers face is blurred out but it's too late at this stage as Xavier storms to the back.

    Showtime: Fun fact abowwwwwww!!!!
    Katie: I warned you

    Showtime pulls the pen out of his leg as we fade to Coach outside selling Two Dudes With Attitudes t-shirts.

    Last edited by Justin Timberlake; January 13th, 2017 at 10:41 PM.

  2. #12
    Skippy Smith Vee-Bee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Rep Power
    A sole individual is seen sitting in a backstage area of what may possibly be a backstage locker room of a wrestling gym. It could also be someone’s garage,-- it is difficult to tell from the rough concrete background behind the young superstar.

    This lonely character is sitting on a milk crate, his hair slicked back and his designer stubble noticeable on his chin. He has the Hipster look down pat with his white T-shirt contrasting with the tattoo’s running down his small, yet muscular arms and the tight, black skinny leg jeans that cover his long, lanky legs. The young man is looking straight into the camera as it zooms in so that we just see the newest member of the huRt roster on the screen.

    You don’t know me yet.

    But my name is Fitzroy and one day soon, not only will you know my name, but also you will be chanting it loud all around the huRt arena when I show you what I am capable of doing.

    When you see me do what I do best!

    When you see me perform in the best match of the night, each and every night you will be chanting my name.

    Fitzroy puts one fist in the air and starts pumping it up and down to match the words coming out of his mouth.




    Fitzroy stands up and walks towards the camera so that you can now only see his face. With the close up of his face, you can now see that Fitzroy is nervous in presenting his first ‘promo’ for huRt. The nerves that plague many rookies of the wrestling business. The nerves that Fitzroy is trying is best to hide, but are still showing in his eyes.

    Eric Valentine is providing us all with an opportunity here at huRt. The opportunity to wrestle in front of a live crowd, to go out there and prove who is the best wrestler in the world. Not just by winning matches, but by putting on a show.

    I am not going to say that I am the hungriest or the most desperate or the most deserving at this opportunity. I won’t say that, because that’s not true. Everyone here is hungry for this opportunity. It doesn’t matter if this is your first opportunity in this business, or possibly your last chance at success.

    This is an opportunity.

    Something that isn’t easy to come by in the wrestling business. Something that we all need to find out whether we are as good as we say we are. This is our
    opportunity to live out our dreams of success. The opportunity to hold off the impending reality that for most of us, this may just be the best that our lives will ever be.

    Fitzroy’s nerves are really starting to show in his eyes. His chin is now starting to tremble underneath his designer beard as he continues his debut promo

    But I will take this opportunity with both hands and prove to you all why I deserve to be here. I will be going out there and showing you all that I not only have the talent, but the passion and dedication to make it in this business.

    I will prove to you that I can be the show stealer and become the future of not just huRt, but of the entire industry.

    As I said earlier…

    You don’t know me yet.

    But soon you will be chanting my name.




    The camera zooms back out and we can now see Fitzroy’s arms again. Once again he is doing a single-handed fist pump, in rhythm with his vocals of repeating his name. The camera continues to zoom out until we get a full body shot of Fitzroy, who now has said his name at least a dozen times and the footage cuts to black.
    Last edited by Vee-Bee; January 14th, 2017 at 8:09 AM.

  3. #13
    I killed a human... Bloodied Fox's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    ...I shot them with my gun.
    Rep Power
    You've probably noticed by now that the world is in a pretty fucking abysmal state.


    A Voice

    Economies crumbling...

    Weather going haywire...

    Bigotry rising unchecked...

    "What can be done!?" I hear you cry out.


    Absolutely nothing.

    A Chuckle

    We're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine.

    And the machine is bleeding to death.

    All we can do is take our comforts where we can find them.

    For some it's sex.

    For others it's drugs.

    A few will turn their faces to the sky and raise up their hands to the heavens, crying out to a god that gives nothing in return but his utter indifference.

    Me? I have a different opiate.





    And that is why I've come here. Not for money, not for glory, not for a gold title...

    Not that I'd refuse any of those, mind you...

    No, I'm here to hurt people.

    In the act of aggression I can lose sight of the downward spiral of humanity. I can forget how truly, utterly, fucked we are.

    In that moment, there is me and there is a victim. Nothing else.

    In that moment, I am at peace.

    That is all I need to tell you. Everything else can stay unsaid.

    Not because it doesn't matter...

    For the briefest of moments there is light, and a familiar face, set in a sinister grin

    Because you already know my name.

    End Transmission

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